September 17, 2022

"Make It Like Me"

This is the perfect answer to all the white-fragility whining over the Black Ariel in Disney's live-action remake of "The Little Mermaid."

Miles Vorkosigan (in a comment on Adam-Troy Castro's Facebook page--scroll down almost to the bottom)
Cue "Under the Sea"....

The Jealousy's always greener
When you've always had your way
The casting for Little Mermaid
Has people in disarray
For Disney's had the audacity
To do something we insist
Defies the innate caucasity
Of creatures who don't exist!

Looking like ME!
Looking like ME!
That's how the white folks and the alt-right folks
Say it should be!
All mermaids must be white as snow
As our made-up evidence gonna show!
It's not what her race is
Just that her place is looking like ME!

Her tail is still green and scaly
She still has the same hard choice
But making her Halle Bailey
Is taking away MY voice!
Now every proud Paul and Peter
Don't like her inclusive hue
We gonna boycott the theater
And hold our breath till we're blue!

Cater to ME!
She must look like ME!
Because if you don't, then maybe I won't
Buy your DVD!
It's all your fault I got the notion
To go ethnic-cleansing the ocean!
Don't you be carryin' any non-Aryan diversity!
Make her like me
We want adhesion to simple reason
Naturally! (Naturally!)
And to really make us bitch
You'll have a drag queen playing the witch!
Don't mock my frail face! Give her a pale face, ASAP!

The Aryan Guard
Is taking it hard
The new KKK
Is crying away
The white-by-default
are planning assault
On Twitter, they're bitter and pale!
The Bijou Beckys
Are pain-in-the neckies
The Cinema Sallies
Holding hate rallies
The film-critic Flynns
Are flipping their fins
And, oh, those Incels WAIL!

So make 'em like ME! (Make 'em like me)
Always like ME (Nothing but me)
If Idris Elba plays William Tell, be wary of me
If your shows pass the Bechdel test
I'll be fomenting civil unrest
Don't call me racist! You're a disgrace, it's all about ME!
Whites are so groovy! Make every movie all about ME!
I'll feel excluded if it's not duded
I'm in a rage unless it's Caucasian
It can't be better-o, unless it's hetero

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