tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27323317.post6983149206725683201..comments2023-09-18T01:43:16.566-07:00Comments on Red Headed Femme: The Feminine Reality CheckBonnie McDanielhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03844134292228113704noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27323317.post-57376876270867207382007-09-12T09:15:00.000-07:002007-09-12T09:15:00.000-07:00Are we to be independent of ourselves or totally d...Are we to be independent of ourselves or totally dependent upon the Lord for life answers? I am not saying we should not have plan a plan A or B in place, or not think about the future, but a woman cannot perdict if her husand will leave her. Should a woman live in fear of the possibility of a man walking out, or should the two of them (husband and wife) plan accordingly if something was to happen like sickness or even death? If she worked, who's to say she won't lose her job? No difference. <BR/><BR/>The article was about women getting screw once becoming stay at home mom. Life happens. I think it should be thought out and plan before you say "I do". And, most importantly, trust in the Lord for the outcome. We have no way of perdicting our lives. I believe if a man wants his wife at home, he should put in place something for her in her name so in the event that the evitable happens, she and the children will be okay. <BR/><BR/>Lunalibra, no guilt. You're exercising a choice that works for you.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27323317.post-72585056223712689412007-09-10T08:07:00.000-07:002007-09-10T08:07:00.000-07:00anonymous says we should trust in the Lord with al...anonymous says we should trust in the Lord with all our heart. Well, I believe God gave us brains and common sense so that He won't have to work so hard!<BR/><BR/>Surely you've heard the joke about the drowning man who refused help in the form of a life preserver, a boat, etc., because "God would save him." The man got to heaven and asked why God didn't save him. God replied that he sent the life preserver, boat, etc., and the man was fool enough not to use them.<BR/><BR/>My mother is a teacher. I saw PLENTY of her teacher friends get screwed when their husbands up and left them in midlife. At least they were working, even if teaching is a low-paid job. The ones who really had it hard were those who had stayed home. And yes, I also had a friend in high school who lost her dad to a heart attack. Her mother hadn't worked in 20 years.<BR/><BR/>I'm trying to teach my kids that ALL adults need the capability of earning a living. Yes, you may end up out of the work force for a while, either by choice or by force (layoffs -- grew up during the oil bust of the '80's). That doesn't change the fact that you need to always have a Plan B, Plan C, and even a Plan D for earning money.<BR/><BR/>In my own life, I work part-time at a job with completely flexible hours and schedule. As a software engineer, I also make more working part-time than my mother does teaching full-time. The baby and preschool years were HARD to wrangle with a combination of daycare and preschool, but it's gotten easier with every year.<BR/><BR/>As a mom, I think each of us has to find the level of guilt we can live with. If we work for pay full-time, we have a full load of "family" guilt. If we work without pay at home, we have a full load of "I'm wasting my education/not supporting my family/possibly ruining my financial future" guilt. If we work part time, we get some of each type of guilt, plus the "I can't do anything well because I don't have enough time for either work or family" guilt.<BR/><BR/>I wish all moms would realize that we ALL have guilt of some flavor and do more to support each other. Then maybe we could all drop some of the collective guilt we carry around :-).<BR/><BR/>Bonnie, it was great to find you. I came here via Churchgal. It's such a relief to find other Christian feminists!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27323317.post-59287189623251409312007-09-09T20:45:00.000-07:002007-09-09T20:45:00.000-07:00Well, certainly. That would only make sense. The r...Well, certainly. That would only make sense. The reason I concentrated on the wife, however, is the fact that women--especially stay-at-home mothers--are left worse off after divorce. <BR/><BR/>As far as "trusting the Lord," I do that, but I also remember that "time and chance happen to them all" (Ecclesiastes 9:11).Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15058219643912780497noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27323317.post-35429856922416474192007-09-09T17:54:00.000-07:002007-09-09T17:54:00.000-07:00What happen to "trusting in the Lord with all your...What happen to "trusting in the Lord with all your heart, leaning not on your own understanding".<BR/><BR/>How about you and your husband, should have a plan in place in the event that something happens to either one of you?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com